Marriage, Family, and the Principalship: Making It All Work

The demands of the principal’s job can’t help but take a toll on marriages and families.
When they entered the profession, most principals knew their lives were about to change. But many entered their new positions with a pretty "fuzzy" understanding of all that is really involved. They didn’t realize that if they were not careful or organized or able to say no, the work hours might consume them. If the guilt of missing family events to tend to school business didn’t eat them alive first, that is.
The demands of the job -- internal and external -- can affect marriages too. In the blink of an eye, the school family’s needs can take precedence over the immediate family’s. And that can lead to Divorce Court. It happens more often than many people care to admit. In spite of the stress and the demands of the job, many families manage to hold it all together. But none of them says that happens easily. It doesn’t happen without effort and planning.
MAKING TIME FOR FAMILY
The entire family pays a price when one of the parents is a principal, said one principal who asked not to be named in this article. "As I look back at the years when my own children were young and in school themselves, I have guilt and regret for time I spent away from home helping other people’s kids and parents," she said. "The job can eat you up in terms of both time and emotional reserves," she added.
For many principals, a family calendar is a key ingredient in keeping things on an even keel. That calendar often becomes a family project. Some families even hold Sunday night meetings to review the calendar for the week ahead.