Listen, and Improve Your Performance!

By Kellie Fowler

Stop Talking
Simple as it may seem, the most important thing to remember is to stop talking.
Pay Attention to the Purpose and the WordsOnce you do this, commit the time and attention needed to actually hear the sender’s message. In doing this, you may find it most useful to, whenever possible, establish your purpose for listening even before the communication begins. For instance, consider what you want your listening efforts to achieve. This can help ensure the results you (and the person you are listening to) can be obtained.

Eliminate Distractions
Next, concentrate on the message by eliminating internal and external distractions. For instance, if you are listening as a member of a group, work to ensure other members do not enter the meeting late, or exit early – both of which can distract the person speaking, as well as disrupt those listening. And, if you are having a one-on-one meeting with someone, work to eliminate distractions such as phone calls or interruptions from another colleague.

Take Notes Using Shorthand or Key Words Only
While listening, it’s perfectly acceptable to take notes. However, when taking notes, make sure to pay close attention, which includes making periodic eye contact, asking questions and paying attention to the non-verbal messages (body language, tone changes, etc.) being sent to you by the speaker. Even the best listener will find this difficult. Therefore, when taking notes, write down only key words or phrases, the things you will need to trigger the message instead of writing down complete thoughts or sentences, which can distract you from listening. (Obviously, remember to expand notes afterwards, while the meaning of these key phrases is still fresh in your mind).

Ask Questions
Questions are a vital component of effective listening. Instead of interrupting the speaker, try jotting down a word or two that will help you recall the questions that come to mind while you are listening. Again, this should not interrupt your listening; rather enhance it. This way, when the speaker has finished talking, you have what you need to ask relative, informed questions, which will help ensure you interpret the sender’s message correctly.

"Parroting" is a Must
Parroting is one of the strongest tools you can use to ensure you are an effective listener. This includes repeating the message back to the sender. This allows the sender of the message to clarify any misunderstandings.
Follow-Up is KeyOnce you are reasonably sure you have heard the message and understand the message sender’s intent, you will undoubtedly find it beneficial to follow-up with a written clarification, one that serves to highlight the most important parts of the message, such as deadlines, project goals, costs, concerns, etc. This can be done in a quick email or memo. When doing this, it is most productive to request a reply. This is just one additional step you can take to ensure you heard the message and interpreted it correctly.

Remain Flexible and Observant (before, during and after communication process)
Most importantly, when working to optimize your listening skills, remain flexible and observant. Work to understand the reason the communication is taking place (considering the objectives of the sender, taking into account any mental, emotional, physical or even environmental or cultural factors that may influence this). Observe the sender and be flexible and open to his or her needs. This may require agreeing on a meeting place that is quiet, or perhaps even neutral (not one of your personal office spaces, but a meeting or conference room) or even on a meeting time outside of the times you normally would attend meetings. For instance, if you know the sender of the message is at his or her best in the morning, consider adjusting your schedule ever so slightly to better accommodate this individual preference.

By taking extra steps such as this, you put the message sender at ease, which will help alleviate any confusion and allow you to hear loud and clear everything the sender is working to convey.

Balance Ensures Effective Listening Success
As always, balance is the key to effective listening. The conversation between the message sender and the message receiver is a delicate dance and, even though your goal may be to simply hear the message, it requires give and take from both parties, from the beginning stages of the communication process down to the end, or to the last word.