St Christopher Will Protect Me

I’m not a confident driver,
An accident my likely fate,
It would cripple me financially,
And the loss of freedom I would hate.
So, I bought a St Christopher necklace,
For some divine protection,
It specializes in almighty safety,
And in spiritual trouble detection.
I hung it from the rear view mirror,
So trouble it could clearly see,
And thus, I was feeling safe,
With St Christopher protecting me.
I took the first corner on two wheels,
Man, I could really fly,
St Christopher swung on his chain,
And hit me in the eye.
I lost control and spun wildly,
Where was my heavenly luck?
I collided, still doing 60,
With a petrol truck.
The tanker then exploded,
Incinerating me and my car,
St Christopher wasn’t helping me,
As I became a human cigar.
I found myself at The Pearly Gates,
St Christopher in my hand,
I know that the angels here,
Would surely understand.
They said, “Son, we sympathise greatly,
And feel some sorrow as well,
But you can take that flaming necklace,
And go straight down to Hell.”

Many people embrace faith for all the wrong reasons.

Cheers