Saturday, February 12, 2005

Flyinging Gnomes from Hell

Challened to write a poem with the above title, this was what I came up with:

The lava boiled and sprayed the souls,
The ash choked them all as well,
The gases raised pustules on the skin,
Of the wretched souls of Hell.
The demons flayed the damned with glee,
The Hellspawn the brave did fell,
But the most feared of all the creatures,
Were the Flyinging Gnomes from Hell.
They fed on the pain of others,
Suffering was their wine,
Cries of anguish sustained their being,
Throughout all of time.
They looked just like you and me,
Until they were enraged,
Then their demonic chromosomes fired,
And their evil countenances were engaged.
They shot sparks and flame from their fingers,
Their skin a glistening red,
They grasped a pitchfork in their hands,
And had two horns on their head.
Their teeth were pure carnivore,
Their eyes a smouldering green,
Their wings that folded on their backs,
Had an oily kind of sheen.
But Hell could no longer fetter them,
They had to break away,
So, they crashed through the Gates of Hell,
To rule the Earth from today.
They smiled as they met the sun,
Creatures so hideously spawned,
They would rule mercilessly,
On this day that Evil dawned.
They decided to cut through the park,
Destroying any trace of green,
Setting fire to anything living,
So that only ashes could be seen.
But being gnomes they were a little short,
And the power left them drugged,
So, before ten minutes had passed,
Each gnome had been mugged.
Sure that their luck had been wretched,
They walked up to the street,
But it was peak pedestrian traffic,
And they were crushed by many feet.
Rallying bravely they engaged their wrath,
These humans they would fell,
After all they were the most feared,
Flyinging Gnomes from Hell.
Their chromosomes transformed their visages,
They rose to full height,
They would cow these arrogant beings,
So, they took off in formation flight.
The Star Wars Program detected them,
Before one kilometer could they pass,
And soon each one flew much faster,
With a rocket up its, well, you get the idea.
With pride dented, but still functioning,
They landed needing repair,
Just as a bus flashed along the road,
And wiped the gnomes from there.
They took refuge on a building’s steps,
From them flames began to pour,
Their vengeance would start with this place,
But then a fireman walked out the door.
They had selected a fire station,
From which to launch their attack,
The firemen thought the gnomes were bombs,
So, from around the back,
Came the Bomb Disposal Unit,
Which was ready in just a trice,
It could extinguish flame and freeze a bomb,
Halon and Liquid Nitrogen is so nice.
And so, Flyinging Gnomes from Hell,
Lasted just one morn,
Now they’re frozen and preserved,
Just gnomes on a fireman’s lawn.

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